So I'll seek you out Just to find myself And I'll worry 'bout consequences later

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

 (Continued from here)

[Kaiba saw the message and didn't bother replying. No doubt the housekeeper had buzzed Yugi into the grounds and would probably be expecting him at the front entrance. Never mind, he'd explain later. So he opened the doors to his balcony and looked over the edge. Sure enough, there he was.]

Try me short stack.

[Yugi probably wouldn't have been able to see the smirk that was plastered on his features, but it was there all the same.]

Comments

[puzzlingly]

「Would he believe him if he told him that no matter how much he ate, he simply didn't gain any weight? It was a thing, one that the school nurse would always point at at any opportunity given, well, it was Yugi's body, not... his own, but still. So, ultimately, he shrugs cheerfully at that.」

Not my fault.

「Yugi does have to wonder how drunk he had been when he first texted him, it didn't seem like Kaiba to share his every thought with him after all, not after... how things have developed between them. He appreciated it immensely, often he had wondered where they stood, friends, or rivals? Could it be both, perhaps?

The answer is telling, Yugi offers him an arm for support, that can't be comfy.」

Let's go inside.

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[The buzz was starting to wear off, the thrumming of excitement he'd felt when he'd been casually taunting Yugi. The back and forth had nearly made his face split into a ridiculous grin.

Ah. That pang again. It was warm, but no matter how he tried to pursue it, it would constantly evade him down every other warren. Always hot on its heels but never able to catch up. Always left behind. How it stung. There it was, swallowed up by a bitter reality-]

...Yeah.

[He takes the offered arm, but doesn't put nearly enough weight on it, not quite trusting him to be able to take his weight.]

You're crazy you know that?

[puzzlingly]

I know.

「He's done... some things. That includes... well, climbing all the way up to the balcony of his rival just to check he's doing all right...

He's done some crazy things for his friends. Kaiba should know it already.

Yugi still pulls him up with all he's got, putting his strength on his hips and legs, not his arms, just in case. Instinctively, he drives an arm around Seto's hips, just as support, and walks him inside his room.」

Does that bother you?

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[He doesn't expect him to capable, and yet there he is being semi-propped up by a guy that is barely eye level with his chest. AT least no one else was around to rub that in his face.]

I'd be a hypocrite if I did.

[Kaiba looks down at Yugi with something of a warm look. He's far too tired to be bothered to hide that flash of fondness in his features.
He climbed a balcony for you. If this was a movie this'd be considered the 'romantic' gesture moment. Idiot.]

I don't think I'd have let you keep my number if I did.

[puzzlingly]

「Yugi sends him a glance, just in time to catch that stare, and he can only blink a couple of times, a little confused. What the hell did they give him? There had been brief, fleeting moments like this in which he had caught those eyes before but--」

You actually deleted it. ... That time.

「CAN THEY TALK ABOUT THAT NOW WITHOUT HIM SCREAMING LIKE A GOAT?!

There isn't much to say about that, however, and guides Kaiba to the little sofa in the middle of the room, helping him to sit down slowly.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Whatever enamoured expression he'd been wearing was quickly replaced with something that could only be called a face fault. His face blanching somewhat at the memory. Oh yes. That.]

Look. That.

[He can't even find the words for any sort of explanation. It had supposed to be something to make him forget, to not have any regrets or strings but no, he got caught. Sure it could have been by someone far worse but he hadn't been able to look Isono in the eye for months.
Kaiba groans and slumps into the sofa, clutching his head as he let it rest on the back of the cushion.]

I panicked, I can't say it was anything else.

[puzzlingly]

I know.

「Half of the blimp knew, dude. But he says it with the most balanced voice he can manage, not wishing to instigate him at all, perhaps he shouldn't have mentioned it. He wasn't looking for an explanation after all. He never did.」

I got it back, so.

「No big deal. He heads to the mini fridge next to Kaiba's desk and grabs a bottle of icy cold water, two, actually, then goes back and offers one of them to him.」

How's your head feeling?

「He tries again.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Never in his life had he wanted the ground to swallow him more than in that moment. But, despite feeling that wave of panic rise back, the fact Yugi didn't make a big deal about it only made him feel like an idiot.]

I'm sorry.

[He takes the bottle of water and presses it to his forehead.]

Not bad. Just aware I'm more tired than I realised.

[puzzlingly]

「He cannot win with him, ever, can he? If he knew that his apparent aloofness about the topic would make him feel uncomfortable too, he'd probably roll his eyes, not going to lie.」

Don't be...

「That was also not what he was looking for. But the truth is, he doesn't know what tune is Kaiba dancing, it changes in a heartbeat — aggressive, passive, that sudden fondness in his eyes... and now the apology — but he tries to dance with him anyway anyway. It's better than just standing there and leave him dancing alone.」

Hmm, too bad... I was wondering if a casual duel would help you relax, but you seem relaxed enough already.

「He sits in front of him, on the coffee table and downs half of his bottle. It's welcomed after the whole climbing thing.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[He takes a deep breath to try and steady himself. All of the usual knee-jerk responses were there waiting in the wings, but he felt as though a thick fog had settled in his head. It put pressure at the back of his eyes, beckoning him to get comfortable against the pillows; maybe pull the blanket over himself.]

Well, I am. So deal with it. It wasn't fair to you.

[With a groan that reeked of 'do not want' he made himself sit up, his head spinning at the blood rushing back to the rest of his body. Slowly he blinked, bordering just on the cusp of being closed a little too long.]

I don't think I'd be able to read the cards right now. I'd see the writing don't get me wrong, but nothing would be processed.

[Finally he opens the water and takes a sip. The cold makes him shudder but it's definitely sobering.]

[puzzlingly]

「It wasn't fair for any of them, but he doesn't want to ruin Kaiba's mood even more remembering something that passed some time ago now. And knowing him, Yugi should feel honored that they were in talking terms even after that. He, however, appreciates the apology somehow, it makes him feel a little warm inside.」

What are you saying, don't all your cards say something like... This legendary dragon is a powerful engine of destruction. Virtually invincible, very few have faced this awesome creature and lived to tell the tale? I'm in shock, Kaiba... Totally.

「Cue little smirk. Hehe. But he sees him struggling, it is as if the generator that powers up all those fences of his suddenly stopped working. He's seen him tired, but not in this particular, less destructive way, more... human, more reachable.」

You should move to your bed.

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Kaiba responds with a low sarcastic laugh promptly followed by a muttering of 'dickhead'. His free hand rakes through his hair, leading into a semi stretch that's as lazy as he looks.]

There's a distinctive window of time in the day where I can stand trap and magic card flipping or effects bullshit. We're beyond that point now. Besides I've been playing around with some new cards anyway lately.

[Bed? That sounds way more comfortable. Not that the sofa isn't but he's made the mistake of crashing on it enough times to remember the cricked neck he had to deal with in the morning.]

Propositions again? Is this the prize you seek to claim? I won't be much fun I hope you realise.

[puzzlingly]

「Cue chuckle.」

Can't wait...

「Huh... to play with his new cards. But that may get lost in between Yugi finishing his water and speaking again.」

Ah, yes. You saw through my evil plan... Whatever shall I do? 「He gets up.」 I think I already got my prize. C'mon let's tuck you in, you rich scrub.

「There he is again, offering himself as support with that stupid enigmatic smile of his.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Regardless of the odd air about his smile, Kaiba let's himself be hauled up by him. It wasn't even that late, what nearly 11pm? This was nothing, but here he was finding the idea of being curled up under those sheets the most appealing thing in the world... Well only if Yugi was staying but that may have been a stretch.]

Are you not joining me?

[There's an element of playfulness despite the massive yawn that wracks him. Almost leaning fully on Yugi at this point.]

I suppose the old man would worry if you did.

[puzzlingly]

「D-dude! Okay, Kaiba might not be super heavy, but he is heavy still! The awkward part is just how tall he is! Yugi tries just to support his weight somehow, but it's not that easy! He drags him to the bed, where he, honestly, unceremoniously drops him there. There is only so much he can do with such beanpole.

What is all this thing about joining him?」

... The old man? You mean grandpa?

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Not the easiest of landings but at least the bed was there. Yes, this was exactly what he needed. He gives a small hum in response to Yugi's question, leaning up and kicking his slipper boots off.]

Yeah. Not sure he'd like the idea. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't.

[His brows dip as he seems to stare at a fixed point on the carpet. The relaxation went from his expression replaced for something more sombre.]

[puzzlingly]

「It's hard to miss the change.」

You still think he holds a grudge for what you did to him?

「Pretty sure he does, but, might as well hear him from him, meanwhile he puts those cute little boots next to the bed instead, then he fixes the pillow for him.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Kaiba rests his forearms on his thighs, an awkward expression that looks something like a not quite grimace.]

Why wouldn't he? I tore up a precious gift and then put him in intensive care.

But it's fine because I was in a coma for six months, suddenly everything's fine? That just looks like running away from the problem.

[puzzlingly]

「After that Mind Crush, Yugi had assumed all these truths had been assimilated, they were never spoken but somehow he had thought they were under the rug already. Apparently that hadn't been the case, even after all this time. But hadn't it been the purpose of it all? For Kaiba to realize how badly he had been managing his own life, for him to put his life together again? There is a pang of mixed feelings bubbling in Yugi's chest; to find out that Kaiba was remorseful about it brought him a degree of joy, that he could feel sympathy for others despite of how rough he could be with people sometimes, but to bring him pain, it wasn't what he intended.

He keeps a rather unreadable stare on his so-called rival.」

He never blamed you, Kaiba. You didn't tear up but cardboard, that card is as important to him as it was from day one even after he patched it up. You also gave it a new meaning and he does not hold any ill thoughts towards you because of that.

「He brings a soothing hand over Kaiba's forehead, just to put a few rebellious strands of hair in place. A failed effort as his hair is quite a mess anyway.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[The way Kaiba looked at him may as well have sent the message that Yugi had grown another head. Why the hell wouldn't he despise him? Why were they such pushovers?]

Don't you people get angry? What's wrong with you?

[Despite the absolute bafflement in his tone and the incredulous look he doesn't pull away from Yugi adjusting his hair. No doubt his bed hair tomorrow would be astounding.]

[puzzlingly]

It was... sometime ago, Kaiba. He is, as you said, an old man. At his age, you can only get angry for so long before you realize it's not worth it.

「Maybe he will realize that too, soon enough.」

I was furious at you, if that helps any... I think that what you did was a dick move, and what I did to you was not out of the goodness of my heart either — if you hadn't put yourself together you...

「you would have died... But that goes without saying. He gives up fixing his hair and pushes his forehead, gently, so he lies down.」

I'm glad you did.

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

In my experience, people don't forget these things. It's ammunition to use later down the line. Something to protect yourself with as much as it is to harm.

[It just drove home further the reason he'd been prescribed the medication and now bi-weekly sessions with someone who somehow knew the way his brain worked better than he did.
Passively he lets Yugi push him back, just accepting this gesture.]

I thought I'd have woken up as furious with you as I had been when you defeated me. But... I was a bomb waiting to explode. Looking back, remembering how angry I was, the things I wanted to do. I was scared of myself. I was so driven to be in control that I wasn't. I hadn't had that kind of freedom of agency before and I was willing to destroy myself and everyone else. To stop myself from being in that place again.

[There's almost a blankness about him as he continues talking, not quite robotic but it's apparent that the medication is numbing him to a degree.]

...This doesn't leave this room. Not until I'm ready to do it myself.

[puzzlingly]

「He's not wrong... Yugi is not about to forget ever what Kaiba did, none of them would, but, none of them would never use that to hurt him. At least, he doesn't think he could be able to in his right mind.

Kaiba lies down and Yugi just sits next to him, forcing him to scoot over some if he has to. The more Kaiba speaks, the more he realizes he cannot suddenly leave, besides, he doesn't want to, he got there to watch over him and so he would.」

Do you think you'll ever be ready...?

「It's not meant to discourage more than to satiate his own curiosity.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Kaiba shifted, rolling onto his side to accommodate Yugi. He mulls it over, squinting as he considers it. The real question was whether anyone else deserved to know. Ultimately he'd have to consider the benefits. What had his therapist said? He didn't have to tell them anything but he could still set his own boundaries.]

Depends on the person.

I've told you more than I thought I would. Anyone else I'd feel like there was something physically stopping me talking, but with you it's easy.

[puzzlingly]

「Easy...

Kaiba might bee a little too out of it, but that manages to make Yugi's eyes go wide for a moment. What makes him so special? From messaging him and... No, there had been other countless occasions that they both had pussyfooted around for a while now and now this and...

He surely feels honored but, he's sure that if he tells him that again he'll probably end up on the floor.」

... Why?

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Why? Surely he realised the bond they shared, and not just the fate mumbo jumbo. Sparks flew when they were together, this Yugi had pulled him from a dark place, there were unspoken moments of deep communication that didn't need verbalising. But... If he was this clueless maybe it did.]

When I woke up, instead of anger I just wanted to see you again.

You challenge me in a way that allows me to grow and you don't patronise me in the process. You gave me long enough to breathe and adjust myself. You're accommodating when I'm on edge-- you ran across town and scaled my balcony for shits and giggles. You haven't been weird about our previous encounters even if one of them was embarrassing.

[Lazily he reaches for Yugi and shifts closer to nuzzle into his side.]

When I'm not stuck in my head, I'm at peace with you around.

[puzzlingly]

「... No, it wasn't like he wasn't aware that they shared a bond, that every time they were together, something happened between them. It had been him who had always pushed it, regardless of Kaiba's constant protests and obvious discomfort. But to hear it like this... It has Yugi's cheeks getting a little warm and a tad rosy. It's obvious that Kaiba is talking much more than he intended to. It's strange, Yugi would have thought that it'd make him happy to hear his rival speaking like this, but the truth is that he can't help feeling this is a little unfair for him.

He nuzzles into his side and Yugi tenses, he can feel cold sweat down his back and his palms. He had forgotten how it was to have him so close to him in such way.

All right, fine, he had tried to forget how it was, he couldn't. It wasn't like this was a reminder but... It has him smiling to himself. Kaiba is the only one that could make him feel like this, so good and yet so uncomfortable, only he could make him have these feelings, so intricate and confusing.

At peace, he says, and yet, he could refute that, asking him why he always gives him such a hard time. Why he often if not always he denies that together, they are invincible. Is it the time to ask, however? Kaiba certainly is talking, but this is not him, not entirely.

It is not without a slight hesitance that the Nameless Pharaoh places a hand on that messy head, just rests it there.」

Kaiba... You should sleep.

「He leans over him, slightly.」

I will be here.

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[Lazily he blinks, eyes closing for just long enough that sleep is far more tempting than Yugi. That felt like a first, but he found he didn't mind. The idea of waking up next to him was far more pleasant. Maybe he'd be able to make a better time of it than when they were on the blimp.

He gives in and lets his eyes close, allowing his mind to wander and paint a picture of what he'd hope the morning would entail. Yugi nuzzling into his shoulder, the covers keeping him nice and warm. Laughing about something, maybe a kiss or two. Not a single care outside of one another. Well, except maybe breakfast but he could get that brought up.]

You should let them know where you two are going to be for the night. They'll worry otherwise.

[puzzlingly]

「That seemingly still hand that rest on Kaiba's head, suddenly seems to be intertwining fine locks of hair in between its fingers. It's so smooth and silky, so easy to tame, unlike his, and he's loving the sensation. He... really does. No, it's not just the hair, it's everything what Kaiba makes him feel.

You two... A little shiver runs down his spine. Even like this, he's able to tell. How come he's not weirded out about by their situation is, refreshing, different. It also is incredibly touching that he worries about him, his family. He can't help but wonder if he'll remember that in the morning. It is also a little funny that he implies that he was going to stay all night, not that he wouldn't have it any other day, but it is as he already made the choice for him.」

I will, don't worry.

「A text to his other self's mom later, Yugi finds himself taking off his own shoes, placing his jacket just anywhere else, and then... and then he notices he doesn't want to risk moving Kaiba so much. He still remembers how sleep deprived he looked back at the hot springs and to see him snoozing like this, curled next him, with the most peaceful expression, he'd hate to wake him.

He reaches for the conveniently placed light switch next to the bed, and the room goes dark, except for the dim lights coming from the balcony. Only then, once again, he leans on Kaiba; he smells his hair and presses his lips against his head before he starts moving away very slowly.」

[b_e_w_obsessiveskeptic]

[If it wasn't any other time then he'd have kicked out the biggest grumble at the constant shifting of his make-shift pillow. But the combination of Xanax and alcohol left him utterly unable to muster the sense of indignance it'd require. A kiss? Well, it was probably a substitution for an apology or something.

Kaiba gave a small hum, appreciative but also aware he needed to find the pillows, his back was already starting to ache at the awkward angle he was sprawled.
But now Yugi wasn't within arms reach. Didn't matter if he was trying to be practical and get out of his clothes, his need to latch at him was obviously greater, he could change the sheets and shower if he was really that gross from his late-night exercise.]

[puzzlingly]

「More than trying to be practical, all he was trying to do is give Kaiba his space, but apparently, he doesn't want it, and it is a little strange to him that he doesn't. He's also making it awfully difficult for him to do it anyway, so, he stays... It wouldn't be the first nor the last time that he falls asleep on his uniform. He wriggles even more and finally settles on the matres, looking for a pillow for himself.」

How's that we always end up like this...?

「He mutters, honestly, not expecting an answer from the very high CEO.」